iSnare.com - Free Content Articles Directory
Authors Contents [Advanced Search][Add OpenSearch][Job Search]
Distribute your articles to thousands of article sites for only $2 and below! Read more...

Index  Self Help
 

Understanding The Supermom Trap

 
[ Contact the Author] [ Send to a Friend] [ Article Publisher] [Make PDF] [ Print] [ Bookmark & Share]
 
Read our Terms of Service before reprinting this article. The submitter specified above has claimed the rights to this article.
Tonya Ramsey

What is it in moms’ that makes us feel we have to take on the SuperMom identity? What makes us put on that cape?

If you talk to working mothers that you know, or even examine your own experiences, falling into the SuperMom trap is common. We all know SuperMom…faster than the microwave, more powerful than steel wool, able to fold laundry in a single bound. SuperMoms’ scare away the monsters under the bed, creates wonderful family meals, as she works, runs a business, or fosters a career either outside or inside the home.

I have tired to be SuperMom, but the cape kept getting caught under the wheels of my office chair, it did not take long to realize that persona was not for me. I was not going to fit into the kind of mother or woman “they” thought I should be. Now, when I say “they”, I am talking about, television, movies, the experts, the writers, parents, relatives, friends, and the neighbor next door, there is this exaggerated set of standards that has been generated that women hold themselves to, so they put on the cape to try to live up to everyone’s expectations.

Being a wife and mother are important jobs; we are the ones that not only carry sometimes the majority of the home and childcare responsibilities, but also the majority of the “emotional labor”. The hugs of reassurance, the kisses that make the hurts better. We are the ones that cry at night after the children go to bed because our little ones had to learn one of life’s lessons the hard way. We are the nurturers, we hold those little hands throughout their lives, no matter how big they are, we always see those tiny hands in our own. No mother takes that responsibility lightly. It is our job to provide our children with emotional sustenance, and so we put on the cape to give our children everything we can, and everything we are.

We forget that we are women…individuals; we struggle with the duality of our work selves and mommy selves as the two selves collide in conflict again and again. As guilt starts to overwhelm us for wanting something for ourselves, we are tempted to give in to be Supermom and leave a huge part of ourselves behind. We ignore our own needs because we were taught to give to others continuously and keep nothing for ourselves. We are haunted by the images we see on TV, in movies, maybe even the examples we saw in our lives of what a mom is suppose to be. These images have a hold on us, as a whisper in our head that feeds on the very concept of ourselves. We put the cape on and assume the role to try to make peace with the inner conflict.

Like the famous man of steel, we take on a cover identity, one that is not real, because we sacrifice ourselves for mommy hood and for careers. We get lost in conference calls, paperwork, school plays and soccer practices. We forget about ourselves as we stay up into the early hours finishing work, or sewing that Halloween costume that was not done even though we were on the go non-stop all day. Therefore, we put on the cape, just to maintain.

By understanding what makes us buy into the illusion that the way to happiness is through being SuperMom, then maybe we can start to understand why we neglect who we are and where we want our lives to go. The understanding will reveal clarity, a hope, and a desire to reclaim ourselves, our real selves and not just the mild manner identity that we created. It takes a desire to reconnect with our inner selves, a willingness to abandon the out dated expectations and the commitment to stop trying to fit into a unrealistic mold.

You do not need to be someone you are not. Leave behind the thinking that life is an either or proposition. When we realize we can merge our duality back into one, healthy identity, then and only then can we take off the cape and let our true selves live and find the life we deserve.

Important NoticeDISCLAIMER: All information, content, and data in this article are sole opinions and/or findings of the individual user or organization that registered and submitted this article at Isnare.com without any fee. The article is strictly for educational or entertainment purposes only and should not be used in any way, implemented or applied without consultation from a professional. We at Isnare.com do not, in anyway, contribute or include our own findings, facts and opinions in any articles presented in this site. Publishing this article does not constitute Isnare.com's support or sponsorship for this article. Isnare.com is an article publishing service. Please read our Terms of Service for more information.

Tonya Ramsey, owner of Life By Design,and instructor with the University of Prosperity specializes in helping women develop a strong self-esteem to bring prosperity in their lives.

Article Tags: cape [See Dictionary], identity [See Dictionary], supermom [See Dictionary]
Got a question about this article? Ask the community!
Article published on May 04, 2007 at Isnare.com
 
Rate [Ratings: 5 / 5] [Votes: 4]

The Foundation Of Self
Submitted by: Tonya Ramsey

Imagine you are building a house The first and most important step is to start with a strong foundation...

Time Management: Where Does Our Time Go?
Submitted by: Tonya Ramsey

Time management is a big concern for a lot of people I keep hearing, “There are just not enough hours in the day…” or “Where does my time go...

Change: The Other Dirty Word
Submitted by: Tonya Ramsey

What comes to mind when you hear the word change Are you fearful...

Yes, You Have Every Right to be Angry But .. .
Submitted by: Jim Donovan

“I have every right to be angry” How many times have you said this or something similar...

Heartbreak
Submitted by: Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

Celine, an only child, was 7 years old, her mother died tragically in a car accident She and her father were devastated...

Free Hypnosis Online
Submitted by: Teddy Maynard

When you have a problem, it's just natural to search for free hypnosis materials online The Internet is free, and it always makes sense to try before you buy...

The Basics of Feng-Shui
Submitted by: Roberto Sedycias

Feng-Shui is an art that was developed over 3000 years ago It is based on strategic beliefs over how a building or space is set up...

Success Strategies : The Right Way to Deal With Change
Submitted by: Mark Thomas Walters

The issue with change is not so much what we think of it, but rather how we respond to change Truth be told, there are few words that throw up such a kaleidoscope of emotions and differing interpretations for us...

Secrets of Success : A Positive Self Image is All Important
Submitted by: Mark Thomas Walters

Your self image holds the master key to your success No matter what level of success you attain 'outwardly' in your life, your life will, ultimately, only ever grow to the extent that you do or, more specifically, the extent that your self image does...

Being a 'Plan A' Person Will Bring You Success
Submitted by: Mark Thomas Walters

Of all the secrets of success out there, being a 'Plan A' person is one of the most fundamental The reason being that the vast majority of those currently enjoying success in their lives are 'Plan A' people...

Success Strategies - Be a Leader and a Role Model For Others
Submitted by: Mark Thomas Walters

Our business has 5 fundamental strategies for success that we call: 'The 5 Pillars Of Success' These principles are used as a daily 'success checklist' by which we run our business and our lives...

Bestowing From Your Bounty
Submitted by: Julie Johnson

Over two decades ago, someone gave me a painted tile for use in my kitchen The counter is protected from hot pot bottoms by this trivet...

Understanding the Stages of Grief
Submitted by: Roberto Sedycias

Experiencing grief is a normal part of life And as normal as it is, it doesn`t make it any easier...

Master Mind Your Mind With Your Own Thoughts
Submitted by: Ronald Kublawi

Mastering the mind is a two-fold process First, understanding that everything is pure energy and that thought is the creator of what the mind images into the invisible intelligence...

How to Create Positive Affirmations
Submitted by: Daniel Britton

Many of us grow up with a set of beliefs about ourselves or comparing ourselves unfavourably with others...

Why Thoughts of Success Will Bring You Real Success
Submitted by: Mark Thomas Walters

Most of us are familiar with the concept: 'What we think about we bring about' And, at a broad, brush-strokes level, that is certainly true...

Self-Awareness - Empowering a Better You!
Submitted by: Roberto Sedycias

Self-awareness consists of digging deep into yourself and discovering why you feel and do the things that you do...

Astrology - Using the Planets to Predict the Future
Submitted by: Roberto Sedycias

Discovering the trials and tribulations of astrology can ultimately change your life As you look into it, it may be an eye opener for you, with ideas and concepts that are deep and meaningful...

Isnare.com Footer Divider

© 2004-2010. Isnare Free Articles - An Isnare Online Technologies Free Articles Project. All Rights Reserved.   Privacy Policy