The Last Straw Leading To Divorce By James Wallis At Isnare.com Ezine Articles

Communication Skills

I would expect my partner to have well-developed communication skills. This is the vital link by which we relate to each other. If my partner were to break this link, it would severely affect our marital union.

Respect

My spouse should treat me with respect. Deterioration in communication skills also occurs due to a lack of respect. Probably, this one reason is the source for all marital problems.

Gender Inequality

Lack of respect leads to gender inequality also. If my partner were to expect the house work to be divided according to gender-based roles it would lead to lots of unhappiness. It would lead to overburdening. Extreme work and fatigue erode marital happiness. And unhappy marriages are best terminated.

Compromise

A stay together is marked with plenty of upheavals. No married couple is happy all the time. Both of us have to compromise. Lack of compromise creates constant unhappiness.

Trustworthy and Dependable

The upheavals of life can be overcome if my partner were to prove a source of strength to me. If this support fails to materialise when I need it most, the undependability of my partner would cause much anguish.

Strength and Support

Either of the marital spouses is expected to give strength and support to the other. The wife is a source of support, promoting self-confidence. The husband is expected to support the wife by protecting against perceived dangers. Failure of either partner to meet the expectations leads to disastrous consequences.

Financial Problems

If my spouse were to develop expensive tastes, I would be totally unhappy with my marriage. Money is the basis of life and a lopsided attitude towards its spending would effectively endanger the financial security of our life together.

All these reasons are significant, though not powerful enough to break a marriage. But, the combined effect of these reasons might work havoc on marital lives. Individually, these reasons are all strong enough to prove the proverbial ‘last straw.’

The reasons cited above would endanger any marital union. However, people deciding to terminate their relationship cite any of the five legally stipulated reasons to petition for a divorce.

Adultery

One fourth of the divorces are granted on the grounds of adultery. But people are, normally, not adulterous by nature. If either of the spouses commits adultery, the above-mentioned reasons might have prompted them to take such a step. Adultery is often a weapon to seek vengeance.

Unreasonable Behaviour and Desertion

Unreasonable behaviour is the outcome if one of the spouses fails to behave in the expected manner. Unreasonable behaviour taken to the extreme, ultimately leads to desertion or separation.

The proverbial last straw would irrevocably break down a marriage if the couples are already burdened by the load of:

• Being the Offspring of Divorced Parents

A family history of divorce fails to provide proper role models for the children. They fail to realise that divorce provides an answer to one set of problems while creating a host of new ones. Divorce causes extreme loneliness. It leads the divorced spouses to depression and possible suicide too.

• Previously Cohabitated

Cohabitating couples are more likely to divorce for they develop a relaxed attitude towards marriage.

• Second Marriages

40% of the marriages in the UK are second marriages. And half of these terminate in a divorce.

• Teenaged Marriage

Every alternate teenage marriage ends in a divorce.

Two-thirds of the divorces are filed by women. But women divorce only after all the other options to make their marriage work have failed. The interplay of many factors leads to a divorce. As mentioned, none of these reasons are serious enough. Yet, plenty of divorces occur due to the very reasons mentioned above. This guides one to decipher that divorces can be prevented if either of the spouses makes an effort to nip the problem in the bud. Untreated problems assume huge magnitude and become tough to tackle.

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