It’s The End Of The First Date - Now What?

So the date is coming to a close and that confident, funny, super-sexy self that cruised through lunch just flew out the window leaving behind the insecure you. Now what?

You realize there is a smidgen of a chance that you could be rejected at this point. Or perhaps you're the one who is going to say, “no thanks.” Either way, this is often the part of the date that most people dislike.

It's important to be straightforward, however you feel about the other person. This might be a great time to thank your date for a wonderful lunch and leave it at that. If this person isn't right for you, then it's better to deal with it now. So be honest. Tell them whether you're interested in

seeing them again or not. Most people appreciate it when you speak your mind, but make sure you don't just dump your feelings on them. Be responsible and kind.

Let Them Down Gracefully

The great thing about having a lunch date is that if you're not having a good time, returning to work gives you a great out without having to invent some lame excuse. If you really don't want to see the other person again, be honest, but not brutally so. Nobody likes to be rejected, so tell them you enjoyed their company but must get back to work.

If you don't ask for another date, the person will assume you're not interested. Don't say , “I'll call you” if you know you won't. There is nothing worse than waiting around for someone to call. It's better to say nothing than to lead someone on. You wouldn't want someone to do that to you, now would you?

Asking for Another Date

If you've had a good time and you really like them, what do you need to do to seal the deal? How exactly do you leave it? Do you linger in the parking lot, lips puckered, waiting for your date to plant one? Or do you sit in the car talking incessantly for an hour or more, too afraid to make the first move?

Hopefully, you'll do neither. If you had a good time, don't be afraid to say so. Be as enthusiastic as you feel. Say, “I had a great time and I'd love to do it again soon.” Then hand them one of your business cards. That way the ball is in their court and they'll call if interested. If you exchange cards, you can rest assured that you both like each other enough to go on another date.

Most women usually expect to hear from a man the next day. And based on our surveys, virtually all men will call within 48 hours if they are interested in seeing their date again. We recommend calling the day after to say thank you or to indicate you'd like to go on another date.

To Kiss or Not to Kiss?

There's really no hard rule when it comes to kissing. We know some women who find it inappropriate to kiss on a first date, and then again we know others who think it's perfectly natural, depending on how the date went. If it's a lunch date, it's probably best to just give each other a hug

goodbye. If you've been out for drinks or dinner, let your intuition guide you.

Before you even go in for anything physical, you must first establish that the person you desire wants to be touched. It's easy to tell; just watch their body language. If in doubt, stay away until you receive stronger signals. Just leave it at a hug or a peck on the cheek. Strong sexual advances too early can be a turnoff, even for guys. So trust your instincts.

Five Things to Say If You Want to See Them Again

1. “I had a great time. Would you like to get together again soon?”

2. “Would you be interested in dinner next time?”

3. “This was a great lunch! I'd like to get to know you better.”

4. “I'm going hiking on Saturday and would love for you to join me.”

5. “Now that the hard part is out of the way, are you interested in going out again?”

Five Things to Say When You're Not Interested

1. “The best of luck and fun in your future dates. Thanks again.”

2. “I can see us becoming friends. I'd like to invite you to my next party.”

3. “I had a good time, but I just don't think we have that much in common.” (Very politely
point out the differences between your lifestyles, interests, etc., which will show why you're not a good match.)

4. “I have a friend you might like, can I give him/her your number?”

5. “I feel that the chemistry just isn't quite right between us.” (This implies it's a mutual thing.)