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The Secret Of A Happy Marriage

 
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Marilyn Ann Barker-Smith

When we marry we all intend to live happily ever after. Why then do so many marriages breakdown? I believe that one of the basic fundamental reasons is the lack of giving love freely to one another. When two people come together and unintentionally only expect to receive love, then ultimately there will be no giving or receiving of love for either. However, when two people come together and give their love, both people give and receive love in abundance.

The secret is you can only give what you possess. To have a good relationship with someone else you must first have a good relationship with yourself. To be capable of giving love to someone else you must truly love yourself. I don't mean in a vain shallow way, I mean in a wonderful healthy way.
The following words written by Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D. are extremely profound:-

CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.
If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.
If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.

So many of us have not been given the love we all deserve but it is never too late to learn. We can all learn to be more confident, build self-esteem and love and accept ourselves as we are. The first step to changing anything is to be aware of it. We must be honest about how we take care of ourselves. Try answering some of the following questions:-

Do you love yourself?
Do you know that you are special?
Do you speak kindly to yourself or do you beat yourself up for the mistakes you make?
Do you feel confident?
Are you calm and peaceful in most situations?
Do you like yourself and are you proud of your beliefs?
Are you happy with the way you look?

Meditation helps us feel better about ourselves. It creates inner peace and builds confidence. Meditation gets rid of stress, anxiety, frustration, and anger. It helps us to be more able to be grateful and appreciate others, become more tolerant and harmonious, have a better outlook on life, and have the benefit of more satisfying relationships. Mediation can only improve the life you are living; providing both physical and emotional benefits that will change your life in a positive way allowing you to enjoy wonderful relationships.

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Marilyn Ann Barker-Smith is the co-founder of Project Meditation. The inner peace gained from meditation can be amazing, which is why we offer a free meditation course.

Article Tags: children [See Dictionary], learn [See Dictionary], live [See Dictionary]
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Article published on July 23, 2007 at Isnare.com
 
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