Divorce: Be The Right Person For You

The best reasoning that you can give yourself for a divorce is this – ‘You and your spouse were both different people then (when you got married), and you have grown to be different people now.’ You have outgrown one another, or you have fallen out of love. But before you see your lawyer, sit down on your favorite chair and think again.

Why do people get married in the first place? If you are like most people, it is to set up a family, have children and enjoy the sense of belonging. Nature intended children to be the joy that binds a couple together. Nothing brings greater joy than having a newly born child of your own. That is nature’s way of keeping a family together. And nothing brings more devastation to a child’s heart than seeing both his parents splitting up.

There are couples with high net worth that end up in divorce so very often, and there are couples that have zero net worth but stay happy together. So the lack of money is not really a factor that led to this. What binds two people together is respect, understanding and communication. People think they need to be in love in a marriage in order to stay together. They watch love stories like Titanic and Pearl Harbor and think that marriage should be like that. The truth is, there are phases in a marriage. People change, for better or for worse. And you need to get adjusted to these changes in order to stay on course, just like a sailboat that faces the strong currents and the shifting winds.

Unless the person that you married has turned into evil or a monster, than I say divorce is inevitable. But if you are just bored or fallen out of love, then there are ways to avoid the ultimatum.

Remove negative words out of your vocabulary. If you are not as much in love as you were when you first got married, at least you can try to be best friends. Be the right person, even when your spouse is not. Be educated on being the right person and the world today is so full of free information on how to do that. The fact that you got married in the first place says that there was something between the two of you that led to this union, and there is a possibility it can be rekindled. Go back into time and replay again your life moments on the day of your courtship, how beautiful it was. How you built that courtship that led to your marriage, and the beautiful wedding and the people that came and celebrated that joyous occasion. Replay that again and again. If it can make both of you feel good and laugh about it, then there is hope of saving that marriage.

But if that doesn’t bring a bit of feelings for any of you, than I would say divorce could be the way out. It may not be a bad thing if it that is the only solution. But work on being good friends. Take out all your negative feelings and emotional baggage and put in a store room and lock it, so now you only see the good side. You will feel much lighter, and much happier.