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Are You Stuck In Divorce Indecision?

 
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Myla Madson

Are you stuck in divorce indecision and feeling lost, confused and as if your life is falling apart right in front of your eyes? I was there too, and not only survived the ordeal, but was stronger having lived through it.

I've never been accused of being overly sympathetic to those people suffering from chronic misfortunate in their lives because I believe we manifest the majority of the bad luck we encounter by our very own destructive thought patterns.

Divorce, however, is complicated because it involves two human beings and one of them is usually much more at fault than the other. The problem is, that fact really doesn't matter because both of you are going to suffer the consequences of divorce and it's generally the party with the "best" lawyer, and I use that term lightly, who comes out with fewer emotional and financial bruises.

If I were to have done things differently when I was making my decision on whether or not my relationship was truly over and if I should file for divorce or not, it would have been to hire a professional counselor to guide me through the transition.

I made a lot of financial mistakes because of emotions, ignorance and indecisions. A counselor will work with you one on one, really listening and evaluating everything you say in order to offer you constructive feed back and guidance. They are knowledgeable in divorce proceedings as well as possible relationship remedies you may not have been aware of.

I, myself, would still have pursued divorce but I would have tried to convince my ex-husband to use divorce mediation instead of hiring divorce attorneys. Ending a twelve year marriage was sad, but the financial devastation both myself and my ex experienced at the hands of self serving attorneys and unnecessary judicial proceedings, magnified our misery a hundred fold and shaped our barren financial landscape well into the future.

Right now I'm sure most of the people reading this article are feeling one of two ways:

One, your unhappy in your current relationship and are seriously considering whether you should stay and work things out or whether you should go ahead and call it quits.

Or Two, you have already made the decision to end your marriage and want some type of confirmation that you have made the right decision

A professional counselor can certainly help you with both of these questions, but at $75-$100 dollars per session, it certainly isn't cheap. Throw in the fact that if you are like most couples in unhappy relationships, money is most likely what you fight about and is often the cause of your marital unhappiness, it's likely you simply can not afford the $300-$600 per month this could end up costing you anyway.

It is difficult to put a price on happiness or to even make an accurate guess as to how much a counselor could save you in the end, but if she does nothing more than convince the two of you to seek divorce mediation, you'll be thousands of dollars ahead in saved attorney's fees alone. The devastating financial cost of a divorce is usually why the majority of them turn so ugly and the two parties resent each other for years to come...sometimes at the expense of your children. There is another option...

There's a wonderful guide I found that could help you make your decision and offers valuable guidance and can save you thousands of dollars along the way. You can check it out at my website at http://www.grapevineassociatesinc.com/divorcedecision1

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For anyone considering leaving a relationship or getting a divorce, got to http://www.grapevineassociatesinc.com/divorcedecision1 for more info. Myla Madson is a relationship expert and founder of the popular women’s website http://www.abrandnewyou.org.
Article Tags: counselor [See Dictionary], divorce [See Dictionary], financial [See Dictionary]
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Article published on February 26, 2008 at Isnare.com
 
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