Body Language - 5 Tips For Connecting With Clients

If you sell a product or service, you know that making eye contact is the first step to connecting with your customers, and then building relationships.

Eye contact and smiling are vital to communication. Have you ever tried to talk to someone without looking at them? Do you feel any connection? That’s why parents often say to their children: Look at me when I talk to you. Without eye contact, communication is almost impossible. And without a smile, the connection won’t take place.

Here are 8 tips to connecting with clients that will help you build relationships.

1. In North America, eye contact is vital to building relationships. Avoiding eye contact usually reflects fear, shame, embarrassment, discomfort or dishonestly. A person who has difficulty making eye contact may be perceived as lacking self-confidence, devious, untrustworthy, or worse. Although the person may actually be shy, and not devious or trustworthy, this is still the perception that people will have of you.

2. Eye contact doesn’t necessarily mean staring into someone’s pupils. You can look at other parts of the face and still give the impression of making eye contact. Take the pressure off yourself by glancing at the eyelid, the corner of the eye or the bridge of the nose.

3. Aim to maintain eye contact about 60-70% of the time. Eye contact for less that 50% of the time won’t maximize its positive impact. A good way to tell if you are making enough eye contact is to make sure you notice the color of their eyes. You don’t have to remember the color, just notice it.

4. Be sensitive to individual differences. Some people are uncomfortable with eye contact because of personality or mood. A shy person may feel overwhelmed by eye contact that is considered normal by others, and may interpret this as a sign of hostility or aggressiveness. Don’t force your gaze on anyone.

5. In other cultures, direct eye contact can be considered an affront, particularly between men and women. When meeting people from other cultures, be aware that eye contact can be perceived differently. If you feel that someone does not want to make eye contact for cultural reasons, be sensitive to their feelings and more modest in the amount of eye contact you make.

6. When someone smiles at you, it’s difficult not to return the smile. The smile has a magical quality that is almost impossible to ignore. There is something inside us that responds instinctively to a warm, sincere smile. We are programmed to perceive a person who flashes a sincere, happy smile as warm, caring, trustworthy, sociable and likeable. Studies show that defendants who smile in a courtroom are considered more trustworthy and honest than defendants who don’t smile, and those who smile are treated more leniently!

7. There are two pre-requisites for a smile to work. First, it has to be genuine, and second, it has to be appropriate. Smiling while delivering sad news makes you look like the village idiot. A broad, open-mouthed smile, especially with lots of teeth showing, can seem insincere because it is easy to put on or fake.

8. In a warm, genuine smile, the muscles of the mouth, jaw and eyes are involved. The muscles of the mouth can be easily contracted, but the eyes are not as easily engaged. A relaxed smile has lips closed or parted slightly. Have a warm, steady gaze, and allow your eyes to crinkle at the corners.