Don’t Do It, Don’t Do It, And Other Things Guys Say When You Are Getting Married

It seems that women (of course I am generalizing) have getting married in a fairy tale wedding as a goal in life.

Men on the other hand seem to kind of wind up getting married because thats the next thing to do. Or they can’t hold off their long term girlfriend/finance’ any longer and just concede that its time .

Most men spend very little time thinking about getting married right up until the time that they suddenly find themselves (even if it was years in the making it still seemed sudden) yup getting married.

Now back to women it seems that women become focused on finding their future husband and getting a big diamond engagement ring going on tour showing everybody their new sparkler and then really starting the planning of their aforementioned fairy tale wedding complete with their ideal gown/cake/bridesmaids/caterer/music/flowers/center pieces etc…

I am of course forgetting the bridal shower and registering for gifts photographers guests lists and honeymoon. The Bride to be has all these things to focus on while of course preparing for the wedding extravaganza and dreaming of what her long imagined and now much planned day will turnout.
(perfect she imagines)

The poor groom to be either “gets” to help in some of these wedding tasks or just gets the constant updates and deals with the bride to be’s ups and downs as the process unfolds. If he’s fortunate he may have the diversion of a bachelor party but he must act like he isn’t excited about attending the party (maybe even say he would rather be with her) Nonetheless the groom does get to chat with all his old friends and some relatives that he likes(and some he might barely know or not like at all) as the wedding approaches.

He most likely runs across some fellows who have survived the whole wedding thing and are actually married men. Here it comes you guessed it These married gents when told that you are getting married nervously laugh and reply in a joking tone Don’t Do It Don’t Do It!

They then laugh it off as a little joke shake hands congratulate you and seem genuinely interested in the particulars and say they can’t wait. Good Luck. This scenario brings up a bunch of questions and some issues which we will try to address.

1 Are those guys really joking when the say don’t do it?
2 Are woman set up for a huge let down when they have reached their dreamed of goal of getting the ring the Gown the Wedding and the Husband?
3 If the answer to #1 and 2 are yes what does that mean about the subsequent marriage?

Oh yeah thats right the purpose of going through a wedding be it simple or elaborate is to unite 2 people in marriage. The problem often is what are they supposed to do then?

How do you make a marriage work?

How do you avoid joining the huge and growing ranks of the divorced? I don’t believe that women spent much of their wedding dream actually thinking about what married life will be like and boom now they find themselves married.

Men (me being one of them) certainly don’t think through much if any details of what it takes to make a marriage work prior to finding themselves married. They just don’t. Based on the above the question becomes how can couples make it work, keep it together, become happy married couples that love each other and love to be with each other as true loving partners?

How do they do it? Especially after the original excitement and sexual heat cools a bit? Well one way to give your relationship its best opportunity to not only survive but thrive is to invest in your relationship invest in each other by joining the members of OURDATENIGHT.COM and enhanceing your chances of actually creating a great marriage.

As a half drunk best man once shared with the wedding party during his eloquent toast ” May all your ups and downs be between the sheets”

Well Said
Husband of Gina Gray