What Can I Do to Get My Ex-Girlfriend Back? By John Belair At Isnare.com Ezine Articles

Ah, breakups. They're an incredibly tough time in any guys life and can be absolutely crushing. For many guys, their first goal is to get their ex girlfriend back. This is a normal reaction since you have lost someone who made you happy, shared their love with you and made you smile. Today, we want to go over some steps you need to take if you want a chance to get your exgirlfriend back.

And these things happen because guys, like dogs, are basically honest. When a guy breaks up with a girl, he says why it happened. When a woman breaks up with a man, she'll tell him three different reasons and he's supposed to figure out what went wrong. No, really. (And women wonder why a large segment of guys decide to play video games and surf for pornography...)

Now, we're supposed to say that there's no malice involved, and there probably isn't. Women when they break up with a guy are doing it for any number of reasons, most of which they aren't aware of. They aren't taught by schoolyard bullies that action A has consequence B, and in their social networks, telling the truth to someone's face usually has dire consequences.

So what's your guy friend supposed to do? Simple - move on with his life. Get out of the house, stop listening to bad mopey music and stop grieving for the relationship. If she's going to come back, she'll do it for reasons he won't understand anyway, and his best way to make that happen, is to go out and do things he finds fun. Call those old buddies and chill. Go to the gym. Walk the dog. Flirt with other girls just to get used to what that feels like again.

Eventually, the "You'll get over her" thing will become real to him. And eventually, he'll be able to look at the relationship, realistically assess what went wrong, and decide what parts he's responsible for, and what parts she's responsible for. Who knows, maybe he'll even put that pedestal he's been carrying around under a vase or something, rather than trying to put his next girlfriend on it.

And, hey, it's possible that seeing him having a life again will coax her into remembering how much fun she was having with him - and things can resume. Or not. Either way, the strategic choice is to play it cool. Look things over carefully, and make it clear that she missed out by not being with him. Play a little hard to get. He needs to make it clear that he's worth the time and effort... and maybe she'll see the light.

When it gets to the "make it work again" part, he also needs to keep his spine. She broke up with him, and likely made everything seem like his fault for being so insensitive. Remind him of that when the negotiations to resume are in play - tell him to set boundary conditions, because as his friend, you really don't want to go through watching him be mopey again.

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