Getting Your Ex Back - 3 Important Steps By Terry C. Jones At Isnare.com Ezine Articles

It's one of the worst experiences ever.

You get dumped by the person you love... or you saw it coming, but didn't know how to save the relationship and so the breakup was inevitable...

I know how it feels, I've been there before and it is not a walk in the park.

However...

Please know, there is plenty you can do to get your ex back, even if right now you are believing otherwise. There are some principles, that if you follow them, will get you much farther in getting the one you love back in your arms.

Step 1) Agree with the breakup (mentally) for the start... This doesn't mean you should forget your ex and not attempt to get them back (on the contrary)... It just means that you should not overwhelm your ex with attention right now, when everything is fragile and should get some distance. If your ex dumped you, they obviously need some space or are confused. You need to give them that space and actually tell them that you agree with the breakup.

Step 2) Don't contact your ex for several weeks (about four weeks is ideal). This is not going to be easy and you are going to be tempted, but it's an important step. Here's why...

If you bombard your ex with attention, you will appear desperate! And this being human nature... we are programmed to reject desperation. Your ex is not going to take you back, just because you ask them!

Let them miss you, this is much stronger move. Once they realize that you are coping "okay" you will become more attractive and they will start to have doubts about the breakup.

Step 3) Plan ahead for getting back together. This is an entire process (as described above). First you need to give them space, then you should never act needy and third... after about four weeks (if your ex hasn't contacted you by then) you should give them a call and have a light chat. Plan ahead where you could meet at first, but make it very casual, like coffee. Test the waters, because you need to know where you stand with your ex, before you can go on to the next move in your plan.

Especially in the beginning, don't bring up your relationship, but just talk about nice positive things, that you yourself have experienced. This will intrigue your ex!

Don't go the "feel-sorry-for-me" route. Go the exact opposite direction. You should project "I-am-able-to-cope-with-this-and-have-my-own-life" attitude. Inside you may still hurt and be confused, but just don't show that on the outside.

These steps are not everything you can possibly know about getting someone back after a breakup, but they are a very good start. On the internet there are plenty of good resources about this issue and if you are at all interested, take a look at the websites I am linking you to below, for some free tips and videos about the mistakes you should avoid at all cost when dealing with your ex (and exactly what to do if you already made some mistakes on the way)

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