The Bouncing Articles. A Little Rant on the WWE Vol 3

I know you all think I am mad because of the name. Today I will be ranting in a good mood, if you think it is impossible, I will prove you wrong. Well, let’s get started, smiley face.

Hornswoggle

Just to let you all know, I will not be ranting on Hornswoggle for a while, he was ranted on in two other articles. Almost everything has good things and bad things, and Hornswoggle is a bad thing for WWE.

The Slammy’s

CM Punk gets a Slammy for stealing Edge’s trick. Wow, for stealing a trick you get the Slammy? Last I checked, you had to earn your Slammy.

Now on to The Superstar Of The Year Slammy. Next time, WWE should really give it to someone who deserves it. I agree that Chris Jericho deserves it, however, WWE just gives him that award to push John Cena, so he did not earn that, unless feuding with John Cena would give u a Slammy, then Snitsky would have gotten a Slammy if WWE would have continued his push, sad face.

The only most extreme moment nominee that I did not want to get it. I would have voted The Undertaker’s fall. Wow, Jeff Hardy does a Swanton from somewhere high, AGAIN. (Sarcastic) It is so impressive that he always does the same thing, like getting the same title shots and doing high moves, wait, doing high moves are awesome, but the same move over again? NOT COOL !!!!

Now they give out Slammies for singing? No matter who won, even if it was one of my favorite, Edge, I would still think that, wow you get a Slammy for singing, I even think that having a jobber Slammy would be more of an honor than getting a singing award on a wrestling show, and I think a jobber Slammy would be dumb.

The announce team is Todd Grisham and Matt Striker?!?!?!?! All I say for this is that Todd Grisham should to more interviewing and that Matt Striker should do more fighting. The rest of the Slammies were OK.

The Title Pictures

Why are the same people always in the title picture, even though I said it is good that some of these people get shots, now it is repetitive. The same people are John Cena, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jeff Hardy (before title), Vladimir Kozlov, Triple H, Mark Henry, Edge, and Batista. The same people over and over. First there is Triple H, he has been in the title picture for all of 2008. First he participates in The Royal Rumble (I do not call that a title shot), then The Elimination Chamber, the Wrestlemania 24, then Backlash (where he won the title), up until Survivor Series where he loses the title. WAIT, after he lost the title, he got ANOTHER shot at Armageddon. Vladimir Kozlov is just in the title picture to give whoever pins him a push. John Bradshaw Layfield got all these shots when CM Punk was champion. Batista, Shawn Michaels, Mark Henry, Edge, and Chris Jericho are self explanatory. Jeff Hardy champion? He gets banned for drug abuse, a few months after WWE gives him a title. The reason why he did not hold the title before is because he blew up all of his chances. He was even scheduled to win The Money In The Bank, but he had to get suspended. Jeff Hardy got a title shot at Royal Rumble, which he lost to Randy Orton, then Jeff Hardy lost at The Elimination Chamber, he beats Snitsky, who they could have let be in The Money In the Bank Ladder Match, but instead of using his chance, he decides to get himself banned, shall I keep going, nah. Now onto John Cena, goodbye World Heavyweight Championship, it will not change hands for a year. WWE should stop giving the same people a push.

The Releases

Look at the people either quit or fired in the past few years. I know what you all are thinking, THIS GUY HAS NO TASTE. Have you guys ever heard of the word “opinion,” if you have not, look it up. MOST, key word, MOST of the people did not get a chance. Snitsky was going to get a chance, because of the “fan reaction” he did not. WWE is blaming it on the fans that Snitsky did not get a push. It is WWE’s fault, IT’S NOT MY FAULT, IT’S NOT THE FANS FAULT, AND IT’S NOT SNTISKY’S FAULT !!!! It is WWE’s fault for his gimmick, get his beard back, his eyebrows back, and his teeth. WWE releases him, and will stay humiliated for the rest of his life. He sacrifices his teeth for the company, what does he get in return, he gets released. Domino was only given a tag team title run, he will really be remembered if all he gets is a tag team run. Rob Van Dam is and was my favorite WWE star, he is better than all of the world champions combined. He smoked some stuff, he did not get a title after, Jeff Hardy failed a drug test, he gets a title. Consider TNA as WWE’s garbage can, although I am stating the obvious.

Superman

What do I mean by Superman? Guess who it is. Who else would it be, who is The Superman of WWE, o yea, IT’S JOHN CENA. It said on one of the match reports that John Cena beat Chris Jericho in a dark match. Chris Jericho was said to be dominating, John Cena does a duck under a chair, then hits of the “four moves of doom” the F-U. I do not even realize why a child favorite wrestler has finishers called F-U and STFU, I think one day those children will think what those stand for. I cannot say because I might lose my columnist job, colon P (:P). In case you do not know, the four moves are The F-U, The STFU, The Five Knuckle Shuffle, and The Back Suplex. The same gimmick, no heel turn. If you do not believe his gimmick is Superman, he gets a Royal Rumble win on with return from an injury. After all that ring rust, he gets a huge win, IMPOSSIBLE.

Dark Matches

Why do they have so many title matches during Dark Matches. Whenever I hear the words “Dark Title Match” guess which word comes to my mind. The correct word is retain. They have so many Dark Title Matches instead of regular Dark Matches.

Survivor Series

I know it is history, but I still want to express what I think what was wrong. For one thing, I was happy when Edge won, but he still lost the title, but that is not the point. Matt Hardy was in a tag team match instead of a title match. What is up with that. I see why he still has the title, the same reason why M.V.P had The United States Championship for so long and same with why C.M Punk did not lose his title sooner, Matt Hardy had elements of both. M.V.P had his title due to lack of title matches. C.M Punk held on because he kept on defending it against the same person (J.B.L). Matt Hardy was in a tag match instead of a title match, so that is the lack of matches, and he kept on challenging Mark Henry.

That is my little WWE rant, I might do another rant. Just to let you know, I was out on vacation, so that is why I was gone. Just please trust me, if you have nobody to push your wheelchair onto a plane, well trust me, bring a family member or something to push it for you, or else everyone will stare at you when you say, “HELP ME.” Now it is time for a little fun fact.

Fun Fact

I feel so stupid or dumb. On The Bouncing Articles Volume one I did a little mistake. It was the one about the top 10 former WWE/ECW wrestlers. I cannot believe I forgot someone, I just like forgot about The World’s Most Dangerous Man, Ken Shamrock, I would have had him at the top, tied with R.V.D. I just cannot believe I forgot him, so let me show you what I would have posted.

Who is number one? Wait I already have a number one, R.V.D. I cannot decide who is better, let’s call it a draw between this man and R.V.D. wait, I have not posted his name yet, well he is only The World’s Most Dangerous Man Ken Shamrock. Ken Shamrock has held The Intercontinental Championship one time and The WWF Tag Team Championship one time (with Big Boss Man). Ken Shamrock has also won The 1998 King Of The Ring tournament. Beware of this man.

GOODBYE !!!!