Matches From the Mind Vol. 3

Well it is the after math of the Rumble, and as such a bunch of crap has happened. We have a new number one contender for whatever title Orton wants. That’s the last time I read any kind of spoiler so close to the Rumble. New Women’s Champ, yay. Any reason to give Melina more screen time. HBK Superkicked JBL and though it wasn’t for the reasons we had hoped we still loved it. And…*sigh…let me compose myself here. We…we crowned…this is painful…we crowned a new…I’m crying now…a new WWE Champion.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! And the worst part is because of Matt. Matt turned on Jeff. I have to say I don’t think anyone saw it coming. I mean after his match with Swagger you knew something was gonna happen soon, but not that night. Then bam! New champ. Now last week it was suggested to me that I should do a rant piece with some random thoughts thrown in. While I don’t think I’ll keep that as a permanent format I will do it this time, because recent Rumble events have set the stage perfectly for something that kills me. So here we go.

There is one thing in WWE, although TNA is guilty of it occasionally, which kills me. And the reason it does is because it leaves an indelible blemish in wrestling history. That thing is very short world title reigns. There is rarely a reason for this. A World Title is supposed to be something special, and that means it should be treated as such. Yet it only seems to be treated that way when in Cena or Batista’s hands. Even Batista’s last reign was disgraceful. It was eight damn days. This has become a big problem recently, but was previously a problem in the attitude era. Mick Foley held the WWE title 3 times, and not once did he hold it for over a month. That is pathetic. The Rock has held it seven times, and all those reigns combined barely equals a year. Seven title reigns should easily reach the two-year total mark, assuming a little over three months to be an average title reign.

Why can’t Eric Young hold onto a title? =(

I wonder if WWE will ever have a successful movie.

Back to the rant. I don’t why WWE keeps pulling these quick title changes on us. It’s not entertaining anymore. It wasn’t entertaining when we though it was real, and it’s even less entertaining now that we comprehend why things happen in the wrestling world. Edge has only had two credible title reigns out of seven. He’s had like four, 3-week title reigns. That’s just sad. If you have the confidence to put a world title on someone then keep that confidence. A World Title is something that deserves to be respected, not passed around like a joint in a frat party. It’s supposed to mean something, but when it keeps going back and forth what does that say about the people holding it? It sure doesn’t make them seem like World Champions.

Remind me, counting Monday, is this 4 or 5 times Cena and Michaels have wrestled?

Santino Marella is the single greatest comedy act in wrestling, and if he’s not then he will be before it’s over.

WWE had it right there for a little while. Give Orton a near seven-month reign, and then give Trips a six-month reign. That was good. Two champions in the span of a year is good. Now we did all get tired of Triple H as champion, and not long after we did he lost the belt to Edge. That’s not bad, what’s bad is Edge dropping the belt 3 weeks later. Why? I was ecstatic when I heard Jeff won it. But it they’re just gonna put it back on Edge why give it to him in the first place. Why not wait. You could’ve still had the same storylines. Instead of someone trying to stop Jeff from living his dream, they could be trying to prevent Jeff from living his dream. Then at the Rumble when Jeff is so close to realizing his dream Matt costs him that again. He comes up short at the Elimination Chamber, and then wins it at WrestleMania. That gives Edge a near 5-month reign, and then you can give Jeff a nice long reign. But my example of Orton and Triple H, even that started out badly. Orton was awarded the title, which I’m never in favor of, and then lost it ten minutes later, only to win it back at the end of the night.

Did you guys ever notice how in the weeks following the Royal Rumble there seems to be a lot of guys go over the top rope in regular matches.

In my opinion more exhibition matches would make wrestling better.

Now in their defense short title reigns are not always bad. Every now and then they are a necessary evil. Like when Kane won it for a day, or when Edge only held it for three weeks against Cena. But it does get out of hand, and there are ways to prevent a ridiculous amount of this. Instead of naming Orton WWE Champion and then having Triple H win it, they could’ve just had a match for it before Orton was ever named champion, and then lost it to Randy at the end of the night. It would have still made for a short reign, but it wouldn’t have made two ridiculously short reigns in one night, and it would have had the same effect as the real version did. Remember when wrestling had its boom period in like 97-99, and I know there were a lot of quick changes then too, but I don’t think that’s why it had its boom period. Then it kind of died down for a while. Remember when it started getting big again. It was when Cena and Batista won their titles. Remember those reigns? They were both in the neighborhood of nine months, and WWE had another great year. They created two mainstream stars with that. Then Kurt Angle won it from Batista, and it’s not like he had a bad title reign. It wasn’t long, but it was good. Then Rey held it for a little over 3 months, and then Booker and Batista held it for decent lengths. That was a good time. Meanwhile on Raw Cena lost it to Edge, then won it back, and held it for another four months before losing it to Van Dam. Van Dam was slated to hold it for most the year, but he had to go and be an idiot. Then Edge held it for another 2 and a half months. Then Cena started on his year long title reign, and that year, as far as mainstream attention, was one of the best WWE had had in a long time. Since then it’s died down a little, and I really think it’s because WWE can’t establish a solid champion. I think when WWE has a solid champion they can stick with it gives someone for the general public to relate wrestling to. Just like they did in the 80’s with Hogan, a little with Michaels in the 90’s. Milked it with Austin in the 90’s. Even Orton started to get a little bit of mainstream attention while he was champion. Think about every time you here some idiot news anchor, or some sitcom character make a wrestling reference. They’ll say something, usually in a sarcastic manner, like “He’s the WCC Ultimate Heavyweight Universal Champion,” or some stupid crap like that, but it will almost always be a Hogan or Austin of Rock reference. You never hear Jericho references. You never hear Rey Mysterio references. Thank god you never hear any Sid references. And those guys all had great title reigns. The Rock being the exception that proves this particular rule. But when people have someone they can tie wrestling too it’s easier for it too stay in the mainstream. That way they don’t have to be asking their kids every week, “Who’s the champion?” After a while it’s gonna sink in. Well that’s about all I got for now. I’ll let you mull it over, and tell me what you think. Here’s a few more random thoughts before the tournament.

I said that I was gonna do a scenario article writing about what the title picture would be provided the other three of the final four in the Royal Rumble had won, but they sucked this year so I’m not gonna. Maybe next year.

I think this weeks TNA may have been the greatest won ever, simply because Black Snow and Chet Lemon were on commentary. That was awesome.

I saw a bunch of “Why Matt Why” signs on SmackDown, but I thought it before anyone else. Don’t deny me.

Now for everyone’s favorite portion of the show, it’s the 1,2,3 Cup. This weeks votes were a little low, but I think that’s because it was thrown in late. So let’s see what we got here. Break my heart even more why don’t ya. The RKO beat the Jackhammer 30-3. The Stone Cold Stunner won over the Pedigree 21-10. The Ankle Lock came way too close to the Swanton, but it bombed its way out of the predicament 19-13. And the main even, The Sweet Chin Music, against the Tombstone Piledriver. It seems as though the Deadman is the one laid to rest tonight at Sweet Chin Music played its lullaby for the Tombstone. Next up is the semi-finals of the 1,2,3 Cup. Here are the matches.

The RKO vs. The Stone Cold Stunner
The Swanton Bomb vs. Sweet Chin Music

Good luck to all the competitors, and now onto this weeks Hall Of Fame ceremony. With the Royal Rumble only a week in the books I felt it was only right to give credit where credit is due. A true man of the Royal Rumble. Before that, though, he held the United States and Tag Team titles in WCW, and was a long time friend of “Flying” Brian Pillman. He won the King of the Ring tournament defeating Jake the Snake Roberts in the finals, officially starting the attitude era. He went onto become a multiple time Intercontinental, Tag Team, and WWF Champion. Among his greatest accomplishments would racking up a record three Royal Rumble wins. Perhaps his most enduring legacy will forever be the legendary feuds he had, almost always involving Vincent K. McMahon. 6 World Titles, 3 Royal Rumbles, and the most captivating feud of our time. This man is no doubt a deserving Hall Of Famer, and that’s the bottom line. This week’s inductee is none other than Stone Cold Steve Austin. Oh Hell Yeah!