Your (Business) Relationship

I used to have a boyfriend that was handsome, fun, interesting and engaging–people really enjoyed being around him. My friends and family loved him because they could see how much I loved him and how much he meant to me. Eventually, I realized that nobody, including myself, was noticing that at the end of the day, this guy really wasn’t pulling his weight. I was doing all the work and I was exhausted. I didn’t have any more to give and the break-up had been in the works for quite awhile before I realized he wouldn’t change soon enough for me. He was a slacker. That said, it was still one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made.

My “boyfriend” was the business I founded, built, loved with every cell in my body. Too late, I finally recognized this business with my business was a bonafide relationship–like that of a marriage. It needed nurturing, respect, and effort from BOTH parties to make it succeed. This new insight helped me to see why it wasn’t just my accountant’s numbers that made the hurt hurt so much.

Right now, countless numbers of entrepreneurs are wondering if just maybe this down economy is the final straw in their relationship with their business. Really, who isn’t wondering this? Even consumers are wondering which “couples” will make it through this recession.

To continue my relationship theme–could you take your business to counseling before it’s too late? Okay, maybe HE doesn’t want to go but, that doesn’t mean you can’t go yourself. There are oodles of business counselors out there to help–SBDCs, SCORE, the SBA, and private business coaches / consultants. It’s time to talk about the elephant in the room–exactly why your business/relationship isn’t thriving right now–regardless of the economy.

If you’re tired of holding it together and just can’t seem to put up with one more problem, just try. Now that you’re asking these new questions–the RIGHT QUESTIONS–and finally facing that elephant square in the face, give it one last do-or-die try. Don’t call it quits yet. Right now, your relationship is in a weakened state and it’s time for you to nurture it, take care of it, be thoughtful of the healing process. Don’t be resentful and don’t be afraid. Just do the work because you now know what the real work is!

And, while you’re at it, stop pushing him so hard. Redouble your efforts and give him a break. He’s going to see your renewed energy, the fun you are having with your new insights and ideas and plans–most likely, he’s going to come around. He’ll see that really, nothing is changed except that you’re back into the relationship with a vengeance–and that means you’re back into him! And, you’re back into him for all the RIGHT REASONS.

Finally, stop worrying about what is going on with your neighbors–they have very little to do with your relationship. Keep them out of your business while you stay out of theirs. Only if you let them do they have anything to do with you. So, stop gossiping and looking for the wrong kind of help. If you must talk to others, only talk about how hopeful you are and that you see good changes coming around the bend.