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The Top Seven Worst Marriage Proposals

 
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Lawrence Reaves

“There are three types of men; the first just need to be told and they do it, the second need to understand the principle behind the action, and the third …well they just have to find out for themselves and piss on the electrified fence!”

The Top Seven Worst Marriage Proposals:

1.You’re What!

This is the response to the man after his girlfriend has notified him that she is pregnant. Of course wedding bells (and shotguns) soon follow. For all intents and purposes, his gasp of surprise is really him popping the big question he just doesn't realize it until days later when she hunts him down.

2.In Jail for Life and No Chance of Parole

How many times have you heard of those jail romances with “innocent” or “reformed” inmates who killed ten million people and then struck up a pen pal relationship with Mrs Bubka from Idaho? She then leaves everyone behind because she has found her soul mate (cell mate).
Look people – if you’re in jail for life with no chance of parole you have no chance of a marriage no matter how you cut it!

3.Miss California Proposal

Celebrity queen, Perez Hilton infamously asks Miss California if gay marriage is OK.
“No” is the effective response and the country goes wild.
Bluntly, I don’t see why gay guys should be allowed to get out of marriage – equality rules and we should share the misery equally. Gay people everywhere should be holding Carrie Prejean up as their newest gay icon for saving them from themselves.

4.Carrie, Will You Marry Me?

The scene is set, everyone knows something is about to happen except the lady in question. His parents approve of her. Her parents approve of him. A fortune has been blown on this so get it right.
All systems are go!

Him: “Carrie, will you marry me?”
Her: “My names Denise!”

5.Be My Future Ex-Wife!

Don’t sweat it! Half of marriages end in divorce but then again half of those divorced once go on to do it all over again.
Do yourself a favor though and don’t be glib when you do propose because as cheesy as it may sound, women don’t get married thinking it will last forever but they’d like it to be.
So, “Will you be my next ex-wife?” earns bonus points in divorce court … for her!

6.“Hey Fool! Wanna Get Married?

There has to be something wrong with calling the woman who is going to marry you, “Fool!”
Fool for love definitely, or if she says “Yes!” to your proposal maybe she really is a fool to begin with!

7.Geriatric Antics – “Let’s Wait Until the Children are Dead!”

Edith Grainger (92) and Jonathan Halbert (96) got married in 2008 after a relationship lasting over 40 years. When asked why they had left it so long to tie the knot, Halbert replied, “Well, I said to Edith, the children are all gone now so we won’t be upsetting anyone so we can get married. And she said yes.”
Both had been married before and with children, but not with each other; their last surviving child had died the year before at age 68.

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Lawrence Reaves, writing about wedding ring sets, engagement rings and fine jewelry. Danforth Diamond provides wisdom and advice to help you choose the right ring at the right price. Visit DanforthDiamond.com or call 877.404.RING

Article Tags: chance [See Dictionary], gay [See Dictionary], life [See Dictionary]
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Article published on October 19, 2009 at Isnare.com
 
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