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Demanding Own Way

 
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Theresea Hughes

Naturally our little ones don’t come with a push button program, so our preschoolers need to be taught how to have patients, to learn they may need to at times have to wait for what they want.

Since you have the know-how and what’s best in relation to you child, you are the most qualified to be in charge of when your child can do what he wants to do as well as what rules are to be met and understood before hand. Talk about the rule clearly to your child so there is no confusion.

For instance, say, “I am aware you want to go to the park and go on the play ground, but its getting late and I’m cooking dinner, you will have longer and more fun tomorrow.”

Tell your child having patient is a part of life, let him know you also have to have patients and wait for the things you want and when the time is right your, and your patients will pay off and will be more appreciated.

Your little one is now finding out that just because he wants his own way not everything in life comes easy, nor is he the only one that wants something but may have to wait. The sooner he is aware of life’s frustrations the more prepared he will be for the future.

Put A Stop To The Problem

Make a start with some rules, also making sure your child understands them before he is to get his own way, give him something to do while he is waiting for what he wants. This will keep him occupied. Say to your child, “when you’ve played with your blocks for five minutes, then we will go out.”

Persist And See The Difference

Only time will tell, even when your child only shows a little patience it’s a start, with your encouragement it will only get better. Reward your child when you notice any sign of him being patient by telling him, “you have been so willingly patient waiting for me to finish what I’m doing so I can get your favourite book. And that tells me what a big boy you are.” This helps him realize he has the ability to put aside his wants, not that he is aware of it yet. What’s just as rewarding is how this makes your child feel about himself, he feels pretty happy, for the reason that you feel pretty good with his behavior.

Count To Ten If Need Be

If your child goes on and on complaining about waiting or not getting his own way, when he wants, remember stay strong count to ten if it helps but at the same time keep in mind your child is learning a important lesson for every day living: the skill of patience.

Try Not To Use A Straight-Out “NO.”

Whenever it is achievable and not dangerous to your child, let him know how he can have his own way. So as he doesn’t get to the stage that he feels his needs will never be fulfilled.

For example, say, “When the rest of your meal, then you may enjoy sweets.” But as we know there are times where the abrupt and instant “NO,” is straight-out this is normally when our child wants to play with or do something that could cause him harm.

When times like these crops up we need to offer another choice of activity to keep him happy and to encourage a sense of give and take and flexibility.

What You Should Not Do

Don’t demand him to do things “now.” Making immediate demands to your child will only undo any progress in the lesson being taught. Realistically if you don’t want your child to demand on the spot results, don’t do to him what you don’t like done to yourself.

No Rewards For Impatience

Don’t give into the order of your child wanting his own way.
There are times were it seems easier to give into your child wanting his own way, rather than go through the moods involved with him not having his own way, but continuously giving into your child wont help him learn the art of patience. He learns his impatient behavior is more rewarding.

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Contributed by Theresea Hughes, creator of http://free-toddlers-activity-and-discipline-guide.com a site dedicated to providing parenting resource articles for toddlers activity & child discipline with positive parenting tips, free kids games, recipes, arts & crafts.
Article Tags: child [See Dictionary], times [See Dictionary], wait [See Dictionary]
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Article published on July 25, 2007 at Isnare.com
 
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