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Shela Dean

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Date Joined: August 16, 2009

Country: United States

 
 
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How Differences Can Make a Better Relationship

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Halloween Every year it's a challenge to be creative and accommodating to my I'm-not-wearing-that sweetie at the same time I love creative costumes...

The Sex Savings Account - Earn Real Dividends!

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Finances

Okay, I'm going to be honest This is not an entirely original idea It was inspired by Brenda and Gill, the most clever couple I've ever met when it comes to keeping things playful and spicy...

Self Esteem and Marriage - Would You Marry You?

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

Would you marry you If you were/are single, are you the kind of person you'd be looking for and want to hook up with Sure, we all want a partner who is our version of the Perfect 10...

3 Ways to Ensure Your Relationship Survives Change

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Years ago, there was a TV commercial for Lipton soup A child ran into the kitchen and asked his mom, who was standing over a steaming pot, "Is it soup yet" That phrase became a shorthand way of asking if something is done...

Relationship Arguments - How to Avoid Misguided Conflicts in Relationships

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

It was in grade school math that I first learned about reducing fractions to their lowest common denominator I hated math Still do...

What You Can Learn From Differences in Your Relationship?

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

One of the coolest things about being in a committed relationship is having someone to grow old with, someone with whom you share so many memories that sitting in the rockers on the porch won't be boring at all, you'll have so much to talk about Equally as cool is how, if you open your mind and heart, your sweetheart can teach you things you might not otherwise ever learn, and can even help you be a better person My sweetheart Dale and I are alike in many ways-the same sense of humor, a love of adventure travel, the same political views, an enjoyment of good food...

Prenup Agreement - Legal and Financial Issues

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

The laws and regulations that govern our life are staggeringly complex No one, not even an attorney, can know them all But, like it or not, your marriage is subject to a myriad of rules and restrictions imposed upon it by the jurisdiction(s) in which you live, beginning with whether you "qualify" to be legally married and culminating with what happens to your property when you die...

Three Ways to Bring Playfulness (Back) Into Your Relationship

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Remember when you and your sweetheart first met You counted the minutes until you saw him again You called just to hear her sweet voice...

Choosing the Perfect Gift

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Gift giving can be treacherous ground but you'll have far greater success if, before you whip out your credit card, you ask yourself these questions: Does your sweetheart prefer things or experiences I could surprise my sweetheart with a Porsche and he'd say, "Why I already have a car...

3 Reasons Why Keeping Score is Good For Your Relationship

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Youíve been told itís death to your relationship but Iím going to give you three reasons why, when done right, keeping score is good for your relationship 1 Itís a human nature ďlemonĒ so you might as well make lemonade...

Relationship Advice That Starts With You

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Do an Amazon search on "self-improvement" or "self-help" and you'll get a long list of books to choose from (including my book Frequent Foreplay Miles, Your Ticket to Total Intimacy) There are books on how to have better communication, better sex, more intimacy, fair fights, more fun, less conflict, a more fulfilling life, more self-confidence, more self-esteem, and so on and so on What you won't find is a book based on the premise that you're perfect but your sweetheart needs a complete overhaul and would be a better partner if he or she were your clone...

Better Emotional Intimacy - 50 Ways to Love Your Lover

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

In 1975 Paul Simon released his hit song "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" I recently looked up the lyrics and discovered something I'd failed to notice in 1975 when I was hummin' along The song is about a woman giving a man advice on how to extricate himself from his current relationship...

Emotional Intimacy Starts With A Simple Touch

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Touch is essential to intimacy Okay, I know you think I've just stated the obvious but I'm not talking about that kind of intimacy I'm talking about emotional intimacy and the hand holding, arms around the waist, bear hugging, back rubbing, cheek kissing, fist bumping, high fiving, shoulder rubbing, bottom patting, kind of touching that makes you feel warm and good inside (and can lead to that kind of intimacy)...

Togetherness in Marriage: What is It?

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

Waxing poetic on the subject of love and marriage, Kahlil Gibran in The Prophet said, "Let there be spaces in your togetherness" Gibran is not suggesting that couples take an occasional breather from each other (although that might be a good idea, too) In beautiful, lyrical language Gibran reminds us not to lose ourselves in our relationship, but to maintain our individuality, and that by doing so we are stronger as a couple...

How to Have Greater Emotional Intimacy

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Intimacy means being connected Sexual intimacy is physical; emotional intimacy is connection of mind, heart and spirit Great sex is a blast...

Couples Communication: Constructive Criticism Seldom Is

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

"You have more butt than you need, but you have a nice shape" That's the closest my hubby Dale has come to criticizing me and to be honest, his comment was merely a verbal observation of fact I now have more butt than when the comment was made, but he's never said another word about it...

Forgiveness in Relationships: Is it Unconditional?

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Forgiveness It's a topic we hear a lot about when it comes to marriage and relationships Lord knows there's plenty to forgive and I, for one, am grateful for a partner who has a generous and forgiving heart...

Differences Can Lead to Greater Intimacy in Marriage

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

Two questions: * Why do made-for-each-other love bugs butt heads, step on each others toes, and get their wires crossed * In a "discussion" with your sweetie, have you ever said something like, "Well, in my book [fill in the blank]" The answer to the second question is sure you have...

Love: Mother Nature's Dirty Trick

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

Dopamine Adrenalin Serotonin When you're falling in love, your brain produces these hormones by the gallon...

Intimacy - When Less is More

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Hubby Dale and a guy friend sat on their boat knocking down a few beers and whiled away a lazy afternoon by listing body "ations"-urination, expectoration, perspiration, etc I tried, but failed, to imagine doing the same with a girlfriend We would identify the three most important "ations"-exfoliation, ovulation and menstruation, three these two geniuses missed-and then go shoe shopping...

Staying Connected With Intimacy Rituals

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

A good marriage has the attributes of friendship There's someone to zip your dress, give an opinion about what tie goes with the jacket, get aspirin for your headache, or laugh at your jokes Good stuff...

Marriage - It Is NOT Hard Work

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

Marriage It's hard work Bologna If my beloved had said, "You know, honey, being married to me is going to require hard work," I would have cut and run...

Humor - The Language of Intimacy

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

Private jokes Code words Shorthand ways of communicating It's part of what makes a couple a couple...

Remarriage, Blended Families, And Blended Stuff - Create Opportunity From Challenge

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

Remarriage It's the "blend" setting on the Cuisinart of life The kids, the finances, the friends, the pets, the former in-laws-all a breeze compared to blending your stuff into the same home-sweet-home and learning, up close and personal, why it's said, "One person's treasure is another's junk...

Marriage and Partnership - The Power of Two

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

The exponential power of two It's one of the great things about being in a committed relationship When there's dry cleaning to pick up, groceries to buy, a dog to walk, a UPS truck that's expected, a lawn that needs mowing, a kid with a tummy ache, windows to wash, and dinner to prepare, having someone share the load makes life a lot easier...

Marriage and Divorce: When Are Differences Irreconcilable?

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

CNN recently reported that divorce has a permanently bad affect on your mental and physical health In my case, NOT getting a divorce would have been bad for my mental, and his physical, health Sometimes we just blow it...

A Better Way to Keep Score and Keep Your Marriage Happy

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Advice

Keeping score can keep your relationship happy I know That's contrary to what gurus have been spouting since the day Adam met Eve...

Memories Ė The Glue That Binds

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

"Romantic gestures" That's the search term I used while cruising the internet "Breakfast in bed" That's what popped up as the classic "oldie but goodie" way for guys to score points, or what in our house are called Frequent Foreplay Miles...

Getting Even (Or Not) - Tips For a Healthy Marriage

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Marriage

Unwanted facial hair Yep, hubby Dale and I have reached that age His ears spawn renegade hair Nose tendrils, if left untrimmed, poke out his nostrils...

Ex's - The Ex Factor

Author: Shela Dean

Category: Relationships

My friends Bob and Nancy have been together since they were old enough to crawl and share pacifiers After three kids and 35+ years of marriage, they're still stuck on each other Such longevity is enviable-and rare...

 
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